Memory Verse: Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his
own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her
husband. (Ephesians 5:33)
God
created the heavens and the earth and then spent six days establishing order
and filling the earth with life. Each day when God finished His work He looked
back on the day and said, “It was good.”
Six
times in the first chapter of Genesis God covered His day’s work by saying it was
good.
Genesis 1:31 Then God saw everything that He had made, and
indeed it was very good. So the evening and the morning were the sixth
day.
There
were plants and animals, fish and fowl, bugs and spiders, seeds and snakes and
someone like God in the garden to take care of all creation. Life was as God
intended and everything was good … until …
Genesis 2
18 And the LORD God said,
"It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper
comparable to him."
19 Out of the ground the
LORD God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought
them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called
each living creature, that was its name.
20 So Adam gave names to
all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for
Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him.
21 And the LORD God
caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs,
and closed up the flesh in its place.
22 Then the rib which the
LORD God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the
man.
23 And Adam said:
"This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be
called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man."
24 Therefore a man shall
leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become
one flesh.
25 And they were both
naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
The
first marriage was divinely arranged by God and is the perfect picture of this
union as God intends.
God
is proprietary and as the inventor of marriage, the term “Marriage” is
trademarked and God also holds the patent.
·
Marriage
is a divine approval on the union between 1 man and 1 woman.
·
Marriage
is not any two people who commit to each other in order to gain assets, legitimize
sex, qualify for insurance, secure change or climb the social ladder.
·
Marriage
should be the union of 1 man and 1 woman in that holy covenant which makes two
lives one in the eyes of God until death parts.
·
Marriage
can begin right or get right and stay right by learning and following God’s
instructions.
·
The
only marriage you can and should work on is the one you have right now. Outside
of that, you can only work on you!
As
I said, God is proprietary – He invented marriage and He holds the patent.
Therefore as Creator, Only God holds the right to define marriage
and He has clearly done so in His Word.
Today
we will survey the roles, rules, rights and responsibilities of marriage
according to the Creator. You would benefit from more information and there is
a guide to marriage and pre-marital counseling which I wrote a decade or so ago
available in the foyer. This book is used as a counseling guide by ministers
and counselors both in the US and abroad. There is more to it than I can develop
in this single class and I encourage you to get one, take it home, read it
together with your spouse or fiancé and follow its wisdom. (I understand that
we only have about 80 copies, our printing cost $5 and we make them available
to everyone who orders at that replacement cost – if you can’t afford one, take
one free … order)
Life
Shape Notebooks … a $6000 re-investment in our congregation and community … we
never charge more or make money off of anything we do with our congregation and
most often bear the whole cost whether it is here in our Church or on our
television programs … our standard is to never make merchandise of the Word of
God. (John 2:16; 2 Peter 2:3) Any extra we receive above pure costs goes
directly to missions.
I
believe it is important that you know the integrity and commitment of your
Church … but for now - back to the Roles, Rules, Rights and Responsibilities of
Marriage according to the Creator.
God joins people together in relationship first for what they can
give, not for what they can get.
1. Marriage Roles
a.
Husband
i. Provider – Work
ii. Protector
iii. Defender
iv. Guide – Recognized
Spiritual head of the home
1. Needs – Respect
2. Gives – Security
(motivated by love)
3. Generally
appreciates headlines
4. Compartmentalized
b.
Wife
i. Healer –
Environmental Specialist
ii. Helper
iii. Stabilizer –
Homemaker
iv. Support
1. Needs – Love
(fosters security)
2. Gives – Respect
(seen in submission & support)
3. Generally
appreciates details
4. Non-compartmentalized
2. Rules of Marriage
a.
What
you did to get you do to keep
b.
No
hitting below the belt
i. Intentionally hurt
ii. Abandon
iii. Make afraid
c.
Do
your part
3. Individual Rights In The Marriage
a.
Two
are one
i. We Share In
1. Assets
2. Liabilities
3. Hopes
4. Fears
ii. We expect
1. To not be
intentionally hurt
2. To not be abandoned
3. To not be made to
fear
b.
The
Exchange – 1 Corinthians 7:2-5
i. Do not deprive
ii. Body not your own –
“My Body” is a reversal of the Word
4. Marriage Responsibilities
a.
Do
our part according to the role we have received
b.
Husbands
– Keep this in mind – 1 Peter 3:7
i. Weaker
vessel/hindered prayers
ii. Don’t be a bully
c.
Wives
– 1 Peter 3:1
i. Win without the Word
– No preaching
ii. Be an asset
d.
Both
– It’s not about you!!!
i. Cover the sinner –
1 Corinthians 7
14 For the unbelieving husband
is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the
husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.
16 For how do you know, O
wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband,
whether you will save your wife?
In
the end, it does take two people to have a happy marriage but it usually begins
with just one.
·
Do your part even if you are the only one
·
Strive to please God more than pleasing yourself
·
Expect to give more than you expect to get
